I always get a chuckle out of the funny reviews customers leave at Amazon — and apparently they’ve now become a regular part of Amazon’s own promotional materials! Today on the front page of Amazon, they’ve included a banner ad pointing to a “second installment” of their collection of the funniest customer reviews. “Back by customer demand,” Amazon’s ad proclaims — urging visitors to read the list “and submit your own favorites.” And this time, the funny reviews are for some even stranger products.
For a shortcut to the reviews, just point your web browser to tinyurl.com/MoreFunnyAmazonReviews. Here’s a list of the 10 more strange products where Amazon’s acknowledging the fake reviews.
Wenger 16999 Swiss Army Knife Giant
Officially Licensed Star Wars Luke Skywalker Ceremonial Jacket with Medal Of Yavin
Zenith Men’s 96.0529.4035/51.M Defy Xtreme Tourbillon Titanium Chronograph Watch (for $81,779.99)
The 2009-2014 Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China (for $495.00)
JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank (“Currently unavailable”)
Some of my favorites are for the “Wenger 16999 Swiss Army Knife Giant”, a 7.2-pound rectangle that’s filled with dozens of additional utensils. “I’ve always wanted to own a pocket knife that was too large to fit in my pocket and here it is!” joked one customer named “MrLiar”. And another funny review made the same point in a story. “Found this stuck into a stone while on vacation… Unfortunately, it turns out that removing it made me the new king of Switzerland, which is a lot of responsibility.”
Sometimes it’s hard to tell where the fantasy ends and the real product begins — for example, in the reviews Amazon linked to for the “UFO-02 Detector”. Retailing for just $74.95, it comes in an “elegantly designed transparent plastic case” which lets you monitor its 16 LEDs which will flash and beep simultaneously when it detects any electromagnetic anomalies. One unconvinced reviewer posted simply that it wasn’t working, and “I am still getting abducted by UFO’s on a regular basis.” Ironically, when you pull up page on Amazon, they’ve included a link to a buyer’s guide about radar detectors — in case you want to compare their respective abilities to detect UFOs.
But best of all, another funny review was actually posted by George Takei — an actor from the original Star Trek series (and now a popular online celebrity). “I purchased this gizmo to play a prank on my husband Brad, who still prattles on about his ‘fourth-kind’ encounter when he was just thirteen…” Takei writes in his review. But that night when the 16 LED lights started their bleeping and flashing, Takei complains that he was confronted by an extra-terrestrial manifestation who’d come to warn him that “what we loosely dub the Singularity was only the beginning of a limitless existence unbounded by physical space and time, and that sugar-free alternatives are actually WORSE for us than the real deal…!”
4,714 Amazon customers voted his review as helpful!
Read all the new funny, fake Amazon reviews at:
tinyurl.com/MoreFunnyAmazonReviews
